Whadja Get F’r Christmas?
Oh yes, it’s that time again! I want to know what you got for Christmas! If you don’t celebrate Christmas, but you got gifts for Chanukah, Kwaanza, or any other gift-giving holiday in the last few weeks, that still counts. So, spill.
I’ll start us off: I got three nice button down shirts that can go equally well with dress pants or jeans, three new ties, new socks (I asked for them), new slippers, an NFL-draft version of Monopoly, a new wallet, a Gander Mountain gift card, a battery-operated lantern for camping, and a book of Wendy’s coupons (because I do so like me some Wendy’s!).
Your turn!
December 29th, 2007 at 11:18 am
1) An old style, stovetop espresso maker. It makes twelve glorious ounces of thick, dark nirvana.
2) A better, larger stovetop percolator to replace my old one.
3) A dozen or so coffees to go with the espresso maker and percolator.
4) Broadband.
5) A Wireless router.
6) Some books to read to Ian.
7) A miscellaneous grouping of horror films.
December 29th, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Oh, and a blog. ~8?)
December 29th, 2007 at 5:46 pm
I got movies and a hat to replace one that I thought I’d, in my doing-ninety-nine-things-at-once-ness, I’d lost. Of course, day before it shows up I find the old one. So, if I get motivated, I’ll exchange it for a T-shirt and if not I’ll have two for when I DO actually lose the thing. And my sisters got me funny t-shirts(actually, my wife’s at the party as I type this and says they’re hysterical. I live in fear). And I got Spidey 3 and Transformers, although that one’s kind of an Us present rather than just a me present.
January 2nd, 2008 at 8:05 pm
I got a rock…
Also, my laptop was a combo Christmas/birthday present and I got a mess o DVDs, including WHITE PONGO. Life is great!
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:50 am
WHITE PONGO?!?!? That’s on DVD? Huh, I didn’t know that. What, is it on one of those 50 movies on five DVD packs?
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:08 pm
Sorry, Chanuka is a minor holiday over here. No presents.
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:39 pm
“Sorry, Chanuka is a minor holiday over here. No presents.”
And yet Jews get stereotyped as being materialistic. Too bad more people aren’t acquainted with reality.
Tell ya what, I’ll send you a gift for “Festivus” and then you can tell us what I gave you.
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:40 pm
“Also, my laptop was a combo Christmas/birthday present and I got a mess o DVDs, including WHITE PONGO.”
What??? You got “WHITE PONGO” on DVD??? That’s so COOL!
What’s “White Pongo”?
January 3rd, 2008 at 5:31 pm
What have you been doing with your life, Myers?
White Pongo is a classic example of the b&w era’s “is this jungle monster really the/a missing link” genre with a few other twists along the way. Goofy as hell, but kind of fun. I saw it on the old Commander USA show. Always wondered if the movie’s name was right though as every one in the film calls the beast “White Pnga” for some reason.
January 4th, 2008 at 11:37 am
“And yet Jews get stereotyped as being materialistic. Too bad more people aren’t acquainted with reality.”
I don’t want to create the false impression that we’re spending the season eatin tofu and meditating. It’s just that Hanuka became more prominent with American Jews because of the competition with Christmas. Here in Israel it’s not a major holiday. As an adult there isn’t even a day’s vacation. We don’t reallyhave holiday where gifts are as important as Christamas. For us it’s mostly about eating.
But materialism hasn’t passed us by, I’m afraid.
January 4th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
Micha, I understand all that. But, c’mon, there is definitely some irony that Jews get slagged as being materialistic even though Christmas has become a commercialized holiday for so many of us. I’m not saying Christians are *worse* than Jews — merely that anti-semites (Christian or otherwise) would do well to reflect on their own traditions and values before slagging Jews.
January 4th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
I don’t remeber who this quote belons to, but it goes something like this: “Jews are just like everybody else, but more so.” One of the results of this is that whenever there’s something people don’t like, you can blame the Jews for doing it and doing it too much. If you don’t like materialism, thre are Jews out there who are really too materialistic. If you don’t like spiritualism, there are Jews doing that too, and in a really bad way. So with communism, capitalism, religion and secularism, nationalism and cosmopolitanism.
January 4th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
What’s “White Pongo”?
Boy, it’s amazing to me that your girlfriend puts up with an uncultured lout like you. You must have the sexual prowess of a jungle ape.
WHITE PONGO is only the best “White Gorilla” movie ever made, beating all the other one (WHITE GORILLA) handily, even though they use the same gorilla suit. Brilliant use of stock footage that almost makes you believe the characters are interacting with the rare African Komodo Dragon! Lame-ass comedy relief! A black guide named Mumbo Jumbo! Really bad science! A white gorilla!
My dad ordered a bunch of schlock horror films for me from some place in Philly and they tossed in the 10 film gorilla pack for free. I may have to switch from zombie to gorilla film reviews when Mad Mike pulls his stunts.
(Hmmm…a zombie/gorilla Jungle movie…)
January 4th, 2008 at 9:07 pm
From the deepest, darkest heart of the jungle comes… ZOMRILLA!!!
Zomrilla! He had a taste for human flesh!
Zomrilla! Bullets couldn’t stop him!
Zomrilla! He had an unholy lust for human women!
Zomrilla! The zipper in his butt could only be seen from most angles!
Zomrilla! Shot in 3-D, Smell-o Vision and Tingler Shock!
Zomrilla! Don’t wait! See it today with someone you love!
*This movie rate BS-13 by the Motion Picture Association of Armenia.*
January 4th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
You know…if they were still doing the Grindhouse Fake ad contest…and I had a gorilla suit…Zomrilla!
Half Zombie! Half Gorilla! All Terror!
“People said I was mad! I! Mad! As if it were madness to unlock the very secrets of death itself! To restore life to dead flesh! And to do it to a Gorilla!”
“But now they will see, see the fruits of my genius! Come, Zomrilla! Rise! Come to me, your master! Yes, that’s…um, you’re hugging a little too tight! Zomrilla! Stop! Stop! Listen to your mast…..UUURRRRGH!”
(Sound of spine being snapped. A celery stalk wrapped in a towel does nicely)
I’ve actually thought about doing a whole movie of nothing but fake ads. Has that ever been done? Seems like an obvious idea…
January 4th, 2008 at 9:34 pm
” from some place in Philly ”
Okay, now you have my curiousity more active, considering if I sneeze in my driveway I end up in Philly. (Great, another bad horror movie. The Sneeze That Ate A Zip Code.) Where, precisely, is this mammoth storehouse of Cheesesteak flavored horror?
Jerry. I do believe that Zomrilla, going by that description, was in my wedding party and was almost decapitated and/or disemboweled by my wife that day. Just sayin’.
Wasn’t the Kentucky Fried Movie pretty much just commercial take-offs?
January 4th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
I don’t know about a real movie that was just fake ads, but I’ve seen something that’s almost as good.
http://www.cduniverse.com/productinfo.asp?pid=6974815&style=movie
42ND Street Forever is a DVD full of real grindhouse trailers. Funny as hell. There are three on the market now and two more on the way. I got vol. 1 as a gift a while back and I loved it. The trailer for The Pink Angels (with Dan Haggerty in it no less) alone is a riot. And, hey, it has the trailers for The Green Slime and Super Fuzz on it as well. Bonus!! ~8?)
Outside of that, there’s (as Sean pointed out) The KF Movie and Amazon Women on the Moon for the odd fake ad or two and somewhere out there is a film that starts out as a long series of fake ads. I remember watching it years ago on Joe Bob Briggs old show on The Movie Channel. One of the ads was a spoof ad on Raging Bull called “Raging Bull$&!+” (without the censoring.)
January 4th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Oh, just in case anyone here does order the thing…
While several of the trailers are fine for all ages, 42ND Street Forever is filled with real grindhouse theater trailers from companies that ran their trailers “uncut” as it were. If the point of the film was gore, it’s on display in the trailer. If the point of the film was showing naked women, then they’re on full, uncut display in the trailer. Send the children and decent folks somewhere else before clicking the “play all” option.
January 5th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Someone posted The Pink Angels trailer on youtube!
Ok, this one is clean as far as nudity goes and the language is pretty clean as well. This is the trailer on the DVD I mentioned above. If you think that the novelty of an entire DVD of trailers like this (and more that are even more over the top) is worth it to you, then you need to get this DVD.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocqQXG7abRI
Oh, and I can understand if Myers wants to nix the link. He doesn’t have many standards, but this may be too weird even for him.
~8?)
January 8th, 2008 at 11:20 pm
Weird? That’s not weird. GODMONSTER OF INDIAN FLATS, that’s weird.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=SLTUV1RitPM
Ok, so I got WHITE PONGO as part of the SONS OF KONG collection. It’s from NINA’S DISCOUNT OLDIES in Narberth PA.
You can find all their stuff at oldies.com. Lot’s of swell stuff cheap.
Anyhoo, SONS OF KONG…it costs $5 (!) comes in a 3-D fold out box (!!) and has teh following:
The Ape (karloff), Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla, The Gorilla, and The Ape Man (all Lugosi), Bride Of The Gorilla (lon Chaney Jr), The Savage Girl, The White Gorilla, Law Of The Jungle (Mantan Moreland), White Pongo (White Pongo), Nabonga (Buster Crabbe).
All in DVD so you don’t miss any subtle nuances.
January 8th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
What’s weird about GODMONSTER OF INDIAN FLATS? I love that film. I own that film. I don’t think it’s wei…
Never mind.
January 9th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I got a copy of Toast Titanium 8 (with Blu-Ray support for that Blu-Ray burner I do not have!), some pots and pans, a new scanner/copier/printer, 2001: A Space Odyssey in HD DVD, some gift cards and cash and a cook book.
January 9th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
You got “Toast Titanium 8″???? That is so COOL!!!
(What’s “Toast Titanium 8″?)
Some new pots & pans… and a cook book? Are you one of those rare bachelors that can cook? (I say bachelor because the last I checked, you indicated that was your status.) I never was. I ate Spaghetti-Os out of the can. Without cooking them. Seriously. My girlfriend (with whom I’ve been living for 6 years, so while technically I’m a “bachelor” in reality I’m very much not) is a terrific cook and now I have even less motivation to learn.
January 9th, 2008 at 9:36 pm
It’s easy to cook. It’s like working in a lab only the result can usually be safely placed in your mouth.
And one of the best developments of the last 20 years is the serious upgrade in the quality of easy to make foods. Remember those horrible TV dinners? When my mom went back to school and my dad had to start cooking for us there were times when he forgot to take the plastic wrap off and the tater tots came out covered in a sticky brown petroleum goo…and they tasted all the better for it.
January 10th, 2008 at 7:15 am
Yup. I can cook.
Toast Titanium 8 is a CD/DVD burning program for the Mac.
http://www.roxio.com/enu/products/toast/titanium/overview.html
January 10th, 2008 at 9:33 am
“usually be safely placed in your mouth.”
Note to me–send/bring tray of Scullion’s Warp Core Breach Wings to Mulligan’s next thingy.
Not for the faint of heart. Or stomach. “Usually.”
Or maybe my famous cinnamon turkey. Or at least a salsa burger or two.